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D.o.t.D.

Each evening at dinner the A100 team have a small awards ceremony and elect one member of the group “Dick of the Day”. Points are earned by being late and monumentally stupid. There are always contenders. The winner wears a suitable badge of honour on their jacket for the following day rather like the ‘maillot jaune’.  And the winners are….


Day 91… Gobby

Dec 24, 2012

After 91 days you would think we would be a bit more orientated on our bikes than some seem to be. In the morning we all gathered in the car park ready to leave down the track. Gobby however, set off on his bike on what we all thought was a warm up lap of the car park. He proceeded down a tiny donkey track in the opposite direction to the 9 other bikes and disappeared. After 5 minutes he had not returned so we sent Butch off to go and find him and bring him back to the rest of the bikers all in hysterics! He did not acknowledge us, and sped off up the right track this time…

December 12th

Dec 12, 2012

DOTD for 12th December was Imelda. The Bok granted a very rare “lie in”, breakfast and bags @ 8am. Imelda forgot to reset his iPad and its alarm went off @ 5.45am. He then compounded it by turning on his iPhone and setting off that alarm 5 minutes later. Shrek, his room mate was not amused!!

10th December. The Bok strikes again!

Dec 10, 2012

He took off his bike helmet to help Gobby, who had dropped his bike in the sand….. again.
He put his helmet on the roof of the Land Cruiser…… he then thought that he would look “cool” riding his bike without it (not that there was anyone around to notice), but forgot to tell Lloyd.
Lloyd drives off in the Land Cruiser, The Bok’s helmet falls onto the sand and only 20k later did he realise that it was missing! Whoops, big back track, search etc……..
multo dicking around!!

Day 54 … The Bok

Nov 14, 2012

Today’s DOTD was The Bok.
He managed to lock himself out of his room and a farce then ensued as he tried desperately to regain entry. Suffice to say that he volunteered himself for the award for multo dicking around!

Day 48…Biggles.

Nov 08, 2012

And the award goes to Biggles.

We were out of the jeep at Mana Pools looking at a pride of lions, which was less than 100 metres away from our viewing point. We then spotted a bull elephant behind a fallen tree to the left of our position approx 50 metres away. That was when Biggles asked Henry, our guide, if we could all walk to a point between the bull elephant and the pride of lions so that he could get a better picture of the lions! His suggestion was met with universal disbelief and we all returned safely to the jeep.  Well done Biggles this puts you in pole position.

Day 46 … Shrek

After a long time, it resurfaced today – 6th Nov.
DOTD went to the canoe containing Tony (the guide), Shrek and The Kid. They probably paddled twice the distance of everyone else, such was their steering skills. In addition, they attempted a spectacular beaching of their canoe, which went wrong. Approaching the bank at ramming speed, they hit it so hard that they almost capsized! Tony, in the rear seat was drenched, as the rear of the canoe became submerged. Shrek and The Kid abandoning him to his fate.

Day 46 … The Kid

After a long time, it resurfaced today – 6th Nov.
DOTD went to the canoe containing Tony (the guide), Shrek and The Kid. They probably paddled twice the distance of everyone else, such was their steering skills. In addition, they attempted a spectacular beaching of their canoe, which went wrong. Approaching the bank at ramming speed, they hit it so hard that they almost capsized! Tony, in the rear seat was drenched, as the rear of the canoe became submerged. Shrek and The Kid abandoning him to his fate.

Day 41… Buspass.

Nov 01, 2012

Yes it is true. Entering the table for the second time only the Award goes to…Buspass. The border crossing from Mozambique to Zimbabwe took 3 hours. Probably not helped by a throw away remark from Buspass.  To set the scene, we were waiting at the Zimbabwe border, whilst The Bok dealt with enormous amounts of officialdom.  To relieve the boredom, we were mucking about with stickers on our bikes. A middle aged African woman rather rudely demanded an ‘Africa 100’ sticker from Buspass.  He told her that “I want, doesn’t get!” and declined to give her one and in an aside to us all confidentially said that it was what he told Julia. Unfortunately, she turned out to be in control of the customs post. When we finally were ready to enter Zimbabwe, she demanded that all our luggage be searched and started with Buspass. Suffice to say, she got her sticker and, after much dicking around, we were finally allowed to pass through.  Imelda’s bow and arrow was not the cause of the delay after all!

Day 40… Gobby

Oct 31, 2012

Gobby is given his fourth DOTD Award. Biggles and Gobby were awarded a joint DOTD this evening for being late to dinner…….a rather low blow nomination from The Kid and Butch, who’s own time keeping has been fairly tardy throughout. Unhappily, the others supported it. Anyway, battle lines have been drawn! So Sleazy Riders break for the lead position is again reined in as Gobby and Biggles join him at the top of the table.

Day 40…Biggles

Biggles also receives his fourth award of the trip. Working with Gobby he has managed to receive a joint DOTD this evening for being late to dinner…….a rather low blow nomination from The Kid and Butch, who’s own time keeping has been fairly tardy throughout. Unhappily, the others supported it. Anyway, battle lines have been drawn!

Day 39… Sleazy Rider

Oct 30, 2012

It seems that Imelda and Sleazy Rider have been carrying DOTD since Azura and only Pat’s brief interlude has changed that…..their joint “non-wearing of the badge”  has sealed their fate. We calculated this is at least 5 days worth of flagrant disregard for tradition and protocol…. well worth a DOTD Award for both. (see the following entry for Imelda) This sterling effort by Sleazy Rider, who only joined the team ten days ago, reshapes the leader-board, snatching the top slot which had been held for 28 days (since day 11) from Gobby. Way to go Sleazy.

Day 39…Imelda

Imelda is in the ranking again.  Once again teamed with Sleazy Rider, both have been carrying DOTD since Azura but their joint “non-wearing of the badge”  has sealed their fate. We calculated this is at least 5 days worth of flagrant disregard for tradition and protocol…. well worth another Award.

Day 32… Sleazy

Oct 23, 2012

The second and third awards of the day go to  Sleazy and Imelda, who both failed to turn up to dinner with their “Dicking Around” badges… This schoolboy error costs them dearly and moves both of this Dynamic duo up another rung of the DOTD ladder with Sleazy moving into joint first place with Gobby, The Bok and Biggles. At this rate of climb Sleazy threatens the top slot, which has been held by Gobby for many weeks.

Tony the guide won his second DOTD for telling everyone that the lodge had a good wine list when it didn’t……terrible crime!!

Day 32… Imelda (again)

The second and third awards of the day go to  Sleazy and Imelda, who both failed to turn up to dinner with their “Dicking Around” badges… This schoolboy error costs them dearly and moves both of this Dynamic duo up another rung of the DOTD ladder with Sleazy moving into the top slot.

Tony the guide won his second DOTD for telling everyone that the lodge had a good wine list when it didn’t……terrible crime!!

Day 31… Sleazy Rider (Again)

Oct 22, 2012

Day 30 saw Sleazy Rider playing in his pond. After managing to dig his back wheel so deeply into a muddy pond at it took the combined strength of the whole team to pull him out. Mucho dicking about!

He then compounded the nomination by leaving his badge in the restaurant!  So Sleazy Rider will be DOTD for Day 31 as well….a double whammy!!

This effortless performance is the first double nomination in the history of DOTD.  Sleazy Rider not only gets himself onto the first rung of the DOTD table but he is now finds himself in joint second place.  Lets see what he can do today.

Day 30… Sleazy Rider

A very heated and animated discussion yesterday evening. Many nominations, including some quite controversial ones, that perhaps would not have been made were it not for the previous nomination, if you catch my drift!

The Bok came very close to another award for his massive under estimation of the difficulty of the day’s riding……to end up nearly 200k short of our day’s destination was a first for the trip. However, his very gracious apology soothed a few ruffled feathers!

Anyway, in the end it was a unanimous decision to give it to Sleazy Rider for his pond experience. He managed to dig his back wheel so deeply into a muddy pond that it took the combined strength of the whole team to pull him out. Mucho dicking about!

Unfortunately, he has compounded it by leaving his badge in the restaurant. So Sleazy Rider will be DOTD for day 31 as well….a double whammy!!

 

Day 29…The Bok

Oct 20, 2012

Two DoTD today….Gregg and the new guide Tony were the joint recipients of the Award. They dicked around at the transfer airport to Rocktail Bay and kept everyone waiting. Gregg almost managed to leave Tony behind. It’s Tony’s first day. Way to go guides….

 

Day 28… Buspass.

Oct 19, 2012

At Singita Lebombo, Jim had the chief guide, Brian, driving his Land Rover. As you know (and if you don’t you should) that Jim likes hot milk in his coffee!  In fact, he gets a little tetchy if it’s not perfect. And so to avoid any issue on this particular day a heating element was provided to make his milk hot. A genius idea, or so you would think. Unfortunately, for all of us, the device failed and short circuited the Land Rover’s electrics, which caused enormous dicking about to get it restarted.  It is not clear where the nomination came from; we think it was either Gregg or Alessia or both of them. But a vote was taken, by all guests gathered to celebrate Jim’s birthday, and the Award was presented. Well done Jim and Brian!

Day 24… Stelios

Oct 16, 2012

DOTD was a joint award to Imelda and Stelios. They dicked around for over an hour, whilst they anxiously ‘prepared’ their bikes for an excursion into the sand. Massive palaver!

Day24… Imelda

DOTD was a joint award to Imelda and Stelios.  They dicked around for over an hour, whilst they anxiously ‘prepared’ their bikes for an excursion into the sand. Massive palaver!

Day 21… The Kid

Oct 12, 2012

George (The Kid), back from university, armed with his new bird book, that enlightens us about the varieties of plumage, but doesn’t identifying the different birds! Welcome back Kid.

Day Seventeen… Shrek

Oct 08, 2012

And the winner is… Spielberg Shrek who, despite all the foot stamping, head tossing, arm waving gesticulations, is doing an amazing job with his cameras.

However, today he dicked about a little bit too long, got left behind, stuck in roadworks having gone the wrong way and held everyone up for some considerable time.

 

Day Fifteen… The Bok

Oct 07, 2012

A100 are at the top of the Sani Pass in Lesotho @ 3000 metres.  An amazing journey, especially on a motorbike, although there are mountain bikers who make it……God knows how!

DOTD is the BOK.   He volunteered himself having cocked up the gears on his bike coming up the Sani Pass. He assured everyone that he was in 1st, but was in 2nd. So lots of help to get him up to the top was needed, when perhaps it wasn’t.

It was a long day……the Sani was at the end and that was probably why things got a bit confused.

 

The HTFU Award (or The Harden the F up Award!) goes to the Ford Everest……advertised by Ford as making it up the Sani Pass but failed. We know that to be rubbish. It broke down!

Previous winners of the not so illustrious HTFU Award include: Shrek for his river crossing capability and Buspass for his ongoing quest to find the perfect coffee.

Day Fourteen… Biggles

Oct 06, 2012

Today’s lucky winner of the DOTD is Biggles………Who managed to miss the last important turning of the day. Top of a mountain pass in the Drakenberg mountains above a town called Rhodes. The turning to the lodge which had been signposted on at least six different occasions during our ascent. He managed to sail serenely past his 5 buddies who were all shouting at him and to disappear down the descent. He then had to be rescued by Gobby, Buspass and Bok.
Congratulations Biggles.

Day Twelve… Biggles

Oct 03, 2012

Hands down winner, unanimous, swept the board. Biggles. Nominated by his close roommate Gobby. There are 4 members of the party who attended the two very comprehensive bike maintenance courses Biggles being one of them. We have had 2 sessions of maintenance on the bike so far. The first one Biggles ignored because he wanted to go shopping. And the second one today he absented himself again. The vote was carried vigorously particularly by the 3 fellows that serviced his bike!!

Day Eleven… Gobby

Oct 02, 2012

The competition today was fierce. We had Nick ‘suffering for his art’ crossing the water hazards on the Cruiser and beckoning Phil to push his bike over through waist deep water so he could keep his boots dry….all in aid of art we were told.  And then we had The Famous African Guide who shall remain nameless Gregg, who stoicly declared that we had finally made our last river crossing whereupon a vast 200 metre stretch of water loomed just around the next bend. Followed by Tim in his underwear at THE river crossing and a minor niggle from me first thing in the morning that The Famous African Guide was not preheating the coffee thermos in the morning. The winner, hands down, was Gobby who had flounced  around at the great river crossing in his undies and some rather effeminate rubber shoes assisting the rather more manly dressed bikers who were trying to ride their bikes through this torrent. Whilst he did keep his boots and breeches dry he did come away with the DOTD and some raised eyebrows from the onlooking locals.  A dedicated performer Gobby holds onto top slot on the leader board.

Day Ten… Hot Lips

Nick has come in for a bit of South African rugby humour courtesy of our guides Gregg and Phil. He has had a little bit of a chill and excused himself from the mornings game walk. Phil has quoted the well known Aussie ‘Chopper Reed’ a few times and Nick now goes by the name HTFU Nick. However this lapse was not sufficient to topple Adam who smoked out the whole group whilst drinking before the campfire. Hot Lips it is.

Day Nine… Shrek

Whilst Gobby put up some token opposition (late again this morning fiddling as ever with his packing), Shrek put in a magnificent contribution and swept the honours board. To explain, the code amongst off roaders is always to look out for your buddy behind. The group had stopped for a breather when Nick came tearing around the corner and stopped in front, not behind, the group. Realising that he had completely forgotten his buddy Charles who had been behind he put in a flamboyant U turn and sped off back to find his forgotten buddy…..not realising that Charles had actually arrived and joined the back of the group. Some kilometres later Nick fortunately gave up the chase and returned to considerable mirth.

Day Eight…Hot Lips

Sep 29, 2012

The DOTD torch was passed from the Kid to Hot Lips. Adam was a clear winner. Not only did he go for a breezy little ride in shorts he fell off on a small sand dune that had blown across the road. Entirely self inflicted and no defence offered. Carried by a clear majority and a lesson learned. Sorry about the bike Stelios!

Day Six… The Kid

Sep 28, 2012

Today there was a clear winner. He won on several counts. The Kid called George. He dropped his bike in the carpark today after 7 days biking! He dicked about having his photo taken coming into a town called George…under the sign! He dicked about again having his photo taken under another sign ….Amanda’s Grave…black humour I am afraid! (Name of his mother)!! He dicked about with a Russian blonde in a mall who was sampling hand and face cream. And worst of all he commented upon a number plate in the BMW garage that had a picture of an oryx on it….and that was my only sin yesterday…not that I am griping about that.

Day Five… Biggles

Sep 27, 2012

Biggles was so late this morning all but Sam had left the village before he emerged from his cottage. And then he discovered he had a puncture from a mishap the previous day. Voting for Biggles was carried almost unanimously by all those who were dragged back to the starting point.

Day Four… Double D

Sep 25, 2012

“All South Africans are thieves!”….she misplaced her camera after the sharks and accused all of stealing her kodak.

Day Three… Gobby

Sep 24, 2012

Last away again…becoming a habit!!!

Oh, and hissy fit in the sand!

Day Two… Gobby

Sep 23, 2012

Last away on first full day

Last away on first lunch…plus mishap in carpark!

Day One… The Bok

Sep 22, 2012

Can you believe he dropped his bike at the toll booth!